As we made peanut butter sandwiches the other day, Ana told me the story of how on one occasion mom asked Bella for a peanut butter sandwich. When Bella didn't make it correctly, she was sent back into the kitchen to try again. And when a new mistake was made on the second sandwich, a third was commissioned, which was also found faulty, and so on. This went on 5 times. AT LEAST 5 times, Ana emphasized. I found this story so amazing I had to stop spreading peanut butter for a second and contemplate.
In what situation does a peanut butter sandwich have to be quintuple engineered? It is almost inconceivable.
First: If one has such simple needs so as to only require a peanut butter sandwich, and one is so desperate and exhausted that one can not even make said sandwich herself, then where on earth does one muster the standards to reject the first four prototypes? Hyperglycemic, no less?
Second: A peanut butter sandwich only has two ingredients. Speaking purely mathematically (if there is such a thing), this english student has to ask if it is possible for a system with only two variables to have 5 different states of being. Isn't it only at the quantum level that these things happen? How can so many things be muddled on one sandwich?
But, I did say ALMOST inconceivable. The truth is I know Katurah, and I know Bella. The former is the Queen of Culinary Perfection, the latter her little Princess of Obstinate Sabotage. Locked in a power struggle that only parents and offspring seem to be able to conjure, what is truly inconceivable is that they didn't go through enough bread to pave the Gaza Strip.
Great post! Keep 'em coming....
Posted by: Stacy | 23 April 2009 at 12:58
Oh my gosh...this is a fun post. You and your lovely wife make a perfect pair. No wonder your children are packed full of personality. Thanks for writing...Beckie
Posted by: BeckieS | 23 April 2009 at 13:16
i would surely like to know the details of those imperfect sandwiches. here, we have some who like more peanut butter and others who prefer more jelly. some who like crusts and others who like none. toasted bread vs. plain bred. chunky vs. smooth. so many variations, so little time.
Posted by: emily | 23 April 2009 at 13:26
this reminded me of a story my mom just told - for years my pop would make his peanut butter sandwiches, leaving jar of pb open with the knife balanced across the top. And for years, this drove my mom crazy - she thought he was "trying to send a message" that she didn't feed him. Finally she asked and found out that he leaves it in the "ready position" in case he wants to go back for more. He rarely if ever goes back for more, but that's the reasoning of a man who loves his peanut butter. Now I'm guessing he does it because he knows it drives my mom crazy.
Posted by: Katie | 23 April 2009 at 14:20
nice entry, King Of Culinary Consumption!
Posted by: Dad2 | 23 April 2009 at 15:48
For those interested in such details:
Only two pieces of untoasted breads were involved, crusts intact. And there was no jelly or jam in the equation. But yes, it took Bella three trips to reach the point where the peanut butter actually covered the bread. At least mostly.
(Yes, I suspect she knew precisely what she was doing).
Posted by: luckybeans | 23 April 2009 at 16:49
Oh boy. If you can write such a great story about peanut butter sandwiches, you should probably have your own blog. Mr. Lucky Beans has a nice ring to it. I'll totally miss you if you quit!
Posted by: Ashley Ann | 23 April 2009 at 18:41
hilarious! what an adorable little family you have!
Posted by: sarahkeith | 24 April 2009 at 04:34
Oh, but there is so much that can go wrong with just two pieces of bread and peanut butter. This is a critique I go through daily, sometimes multiple times a day. See, I have a 6 yo daughter who is the Princess of Peanut Butter sandwiches.....and as she is very very picky - she only eats these and cereal *sigh*.
*chuckling* Yes I know we should make her try more foods....but watching someone purposefully gag at the table. Well that sets a bad example for her siblings who eat whatever we have on the table (well not the art supplies at least).
Do we know what Mom will be given as a special meal on her return? *wink* Most likely made to her exacting standards. :)
Posted by: Lindsey | 24 April 2009 at 09:43
I really loved your articles, especially the one about Peanut butter. Was amazing.
Keep writing.
Best,
Swapna
http://petalsfromtheheart.blogspot.com/
Posted by: Swapna Raghu Sanand | 25 April 2009 at 07:29